HEAR HER GIGGS

i do remember what he said. eventhough its in front of us, we never can get it. that's what i was going to say to him but im too weak. why? im too weak. i cannot say anything, my most stupid act! my silenceness, not meaning that im cruel rite? am i cruel? now what i have to do? he hates me then. i dont have face to meet him.
i only need he understand what i mean. am i too selfish? that is! im selfish, careless, and stupid! no one cares about me because i even cant appreciate people. and he.. who was very strict about me, now he hates me.
sometimes i think its better if he hates me. i deserve it. he's too nice for me. what does he look after me? what's good in me?
dont you know? you cruel as well. everyone judge me, you always do that to me, it makes me more hurt,
no. you dont know how it feels. if you know, you'll not do that to me. YES. you are the only one who dont know!
nothing else to say, im lose..